Thank you for being my guest adoption blogger this week!!

God placed adoption on my heart at an early age.  In high school, I knew that one day I wanted to adopt. I had not only a love for children, but also a love for adoption.  I just thought it was a beautiful picture of what the Heavenly Father does for us, and I loved the idea of helping and loving a child who did not have a family.  When Jayson and I started dating, adoption was one of the things we discussed.

I was so very thankful that he thought adoption was great as well and did not have any concerns about growing our family this way one day in the future.  Once we were married, we were eager to start our family.  The Lord blessed us with two biological boys, but adoption was still on our hearts.  When our youngest son was just about 14 months, we decided it was time to move forward to adopt.  We met a family who adopted a little girl from Taiwan.  We did a little research and found an agency right in our home state of Florida that worked in Taiwan.  We qualified, made some calls, and decided to go ahead and get waiting (since it would take about 2 years to complete the process.)  The waiting was VERY hard.  Even though we knew going into it that we would have to wait, I was just very unsettled and not content waiting.  There were children all over the world that needed families RIGHT NOW.  I was ready to have a baby (and hopefully a girl) RIGHT NOW.  It just didn’t seem right to wait on a long waiting list when children were waiting.  So, we had waited over a year with not much movement in the Taiwan program and the need just didn’t seem to be very big there.  We started looking into other countries where there was a greater need.  Our friend’s friend had just adopted from Uganda and was trying to place some of the children she met while there with forever families.  After getting in touch, we soon learned that God was directing us to Uganda.  There were children waiting for homes.  We would not have to sit on a waiting list.  We got to work on updating our home study and gathering all the information that would be needed for our dossier.  We were hoping for a baby girl.  After two boys, my heart was longing for a daughter.  But we were told that we needed to be open to either gender, and we agreed that as much as we were praying and hoping for a daughter, it wasn’t about us.  It was about a child in need of a family, and we decided that if God wanted us to have another son then that would be just fine with us.

When our paperwork was complete and we were just waiting on our I171h approval, we were matched with our precious DAUGHTER!  We couldn’t believe that we were going to be the parents of a little baby girl. Seeing her face for the first time over the computer was amazing and thankfully we only had to wait a few months before we were able to travel to Uganda and meet our newest addition.  We were in love with her right away, and we also fell in love with Uganda.  The culture, the beauty, the lifestyle, the friends, the food-we LOVED it all and miss it now.  We are already anxious to return, whether it be for Missions trips, vacations, or hopefully another adoption journey.  We have been home with our little girl for over 5 months now, and we are enjoying every minute of parenting her.  She has grown so much and is doing so well.  She is walking (almost running) everywhere!  She loves to eat!  She loves playing with her big brothers.  She loves to be cuddled.  She does not like to have her hair done, but I am still trying.  She is our daughter and we love her so much.  We cannot imagine life without her.  She has brought us so much joy, and we our honored that we get to be her parents.  We will forever be grateful to those that helped us in this process, and our lives will never be the same.  Uganda will forever be a part of our lives.  We love this beautiful country that gave us our beautiful daughter.  We love how God directed us, all the way across the world in the U.S., to our daughter in Uganda.  It is truly a miracle.

Current Update:  Kai has now been home over 10 months and is doing so well.  She has grown a ton and is so happy and active. She loves running around the house and playing with her big brothers.  In September, I was so blessed to be able to return to Uganda.  I went with Sixty Feet on an amazing missions trip and made many new friends and spent time with some of the sweetest children ever.  I would encourage everyone to check out this amazing organization and consider going on a future missions trip.  You will forever be changed and it would be so meaningful to the staff in Uganda and the children residing in remand centers there.  I also was able to visit the orphanage where our daughter once was and able to show the amazing ladies that care for the children there how much she has grown through a picture book.  We are excited to begin the process of adopting our next child from Uganda.  Our home study is scheduled for December 12 and we look forward to seeing how God works to bring us our the next Harvey.  We can’t wait to return to Uganda in 2012!  Please feel free to follow our journey here.

Thank you for being my guest adoption blogger this week! Your story is so inspiring!

This adoption was an adoption of faith-almost from day one!  We signed on with our agency in February and were excited to again add to our family through the miracle of adoption. Greg lost his job in October, along with the $5000 adoption credit his company would give. Yikes!  There were so many questions at that time–where would he find a job? Would we have to move? What about the adoption? Did we hear God wrong?  We chose to have faith and believe God had something in store for us and He did! Greg took a job with our local food bank which lines up with his heart for helping the vulnerable! We were blessed as he only had to go two weeks without a job.

We continued to wait for our referral.

In March we received the referral of a beautiful baby boy whose name means “Praise.” We were excited and quickly fell in love. We received a court date for the first week of June. The Monday of the week were leaving, I received that DREADED phone call.  Our little one’s mother came to court and changed her mind and took him home. My first emotional reaction? I am done. Adoption is too hard. I can’t stand the emotional roller coaster anymore.  I AM DONE! 

Even in the midst of this God was working and moving. My caseworker called my husband first and told him to come home. A friend was walking up the walk for a play date minutes after I hung up. (little did she know it was going to be a cry fest!)  We cried, prayed, asked many why’s and just sat in silence. 

As we continued to pray God asked me, “what is adoption about? You or the child that needs a home?”  I began to realize, (I knew it down deep but it finally rose to the surface of my heart) that this was a good thing.   If this little baby’s mom changed her mind and could raise him–than that is who he should be with!  A friend emailed me words that comforted my heart “a baby is back in the arms of his mother tonight.”  How could I be upset with that?  Was I grieving?  Yes–for the loss of the child who we thought would be our son. However, I was so happy that this child could be raised by the mother that carried him, named him, and loved him. 

We were also blessed to have friends there when she picked up him from the orphanage that took pictures of them together and told us that she loved him and he would be okay.  Our hearts will forever be linked to theirs. There was a purpose and reason for all of it. Little “Praise” will be thought of and in our prayers for the rest of our lives.  He was not to be our son, but he will not be forgotten.

Fast forward a couple of days and we received another referral of a tiny little boy, Teshale, whose name means “Better One.” I can’t even begin to tell you how that confirmed everything for us. God has blessed us immensely and looking back we can see how everything worked according to His plan.  Teshale needed to be home quickly. Because we were already in the court system, the gracious judge just postponed our court date for us.  As my caseworker said, “you are ready and he needs to be home quickly–a perfect situation.”

July 15 we were in Ethiopia for court and met our son. He was our son! The bond was immediate and we knew this was the child God had for our family. We came home September 10^th ( after an amazingly quick for clearing Embassy) and are doing well. Adoption is hard. It is emotional.  It is full of bumps, curves, and road blocks.

It is worth it.

I now have so much more of a picture of what Christ endured for me. I have a glimpse of His heartache and passion. As I sat and cried over that first little boy I imagined how God weeps over those that He longs to have as His children.

God, continue to break my heart for the things that break Yours.
My Blog:
www.forsuchasthese.blogspot.com

www.grassrootsheroes.org

We just adopted…BELLA is finally home & we are all in love with her!

Josh and I have felt it on our heart for years to adopt even before we had kids.  We have tried several times to look into different options but before things could go very far it would always fall through.   We know that at the core of Gods heart is a longing and a desire for children to have life, be loved and cared for.  Here is the answer to YEARS of prayer and a life saved!!  Introducing BELLA CHRISTIAN NEELEY born Sunday, April 19, 2009 at 7:11 am 3.52 kilos, or 7.74 lbs

“True religion is this to care for the orphans and the widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world”-James

I got the call on Sun at 1:45 am that Mary had gone into labor and we (Amanda my friend & I) were to meet her at the hospital.  So I got dressed fast and ran in the dark to my friend Amanda’s house down the road a ways to get her.  There was a little confusion and we finally got a hold of the guy who was to take us to the hospital (remember neither of our families have cars, and bus’ don’t run in the middle of the night here unless they are just getting done drinking or coming from a kava bar (not good if you are the one getting a ride!).  We had woken him up and it turns out he went right back to sleep! So an hour later we figured out what happened and had to wake Amanda’s husband  Jeff (you can’t go out as a girl with out a guy in the  middle of the night for safety reasons.)  Then we had to pray for a Taxi cause it was the middle of the night and just as I prayed one showed up (we had only seen two vehicles period in the last hour we had been there!)

Finally after much waiting and praying Little Bella was born at 7 am!

This photo is of when she was only 20 min old!  Pre bath.  I was the very first person to touch her after delivery except for the nurse who delivered her!  She was under a heat lamp crying while the nurse attended to Mary (birth mother) and I was able to touch her and soothe her.  I was even able to give her her first bath !

The kids and Josh came as soon as they were allowed at about 8:30 on their way to church which happens to be right behind the hospital.  They were all so excited to meet her!

Notice the falling off diaper! Dahlia was crying cause all She got to hold were Bella’s feet.  Pierce and Dahlia just love having a little sister.  Dahlia keeps tugging on my pants saying “I can’t see my baby” when I am holding her.

This morning she got out of bed saying “Ours baby! Ours baby!”  Like where is our baby?  Usually she yells “mama” and waits for me to get her out of bed.  Unfortunately at this point Bella much prefers if Josh or I hold her…Don’t know why.

This is the brave lady who gave Bella to us.  She is sitting with her daughter on her left and her sister on her right.  She is 36 and is not married, and the father is long gone.  Her parents are not willing to take another of her children as they have raised the other kids (the girl above 18 and two boys 7 and 10).  She knew we were her answer to prayer as to what to do concerning the baby.

Giving the baby up was hard for her to do even though she had planned it for months.  It was a bit emotional at the actual passing over when she got off the bus before us.  She didn’t say anything and I croaked out an awkward “Thank you, thank you” not knowing what else to say.  I am pretty sure she didn’t see me crying as I received the baby from her sister who was with her cause she wouldn’t look at me.  I think she was trying not to let me see her emotions.  I  wrote her a letter and stuck it in her bag at the hospital.  I just wanted to go beyond the language barrier and say that we were honored and thanked her for choosing life for our now daughter.  I reminded her that the love we feel for this baby is the same love God has for us (including her) as He says in the Bible he has “adopted” us in to His family.  I continued to tell her that God has a plan for her life and for Bella’s life and that we were blessed to be a part of it.  I also reminded her that God brings the best out of a very bad situation and that this was exactly that.  We have asked her to write a letter to  Bella telling her why she choose to relinquish her to us and that it was not because she didn’t love her…  I hope that she will do that for Bella’s sake and for hers.  We find it amazing that somehow God arranged it all to go so smoothly.  What a blessing little Bella is to us.  Truly Gods gift to us.

Kristy- www.apronsandapples.blogspot.com

I’m Christy, wife to Jeff and Momma to four amazing kiddos, Avery (10), Karsen (7), Cohen (5) and Bereket (3).  Here is a little bit about how we followed God’s call for our family.

The summer of 2006 we watched a special on Africa and I looked at my husband Jeff and said, “I think we need a little boy from Africa!”  With a five year old, a two year old and a fussy three month old he looked at me like I had two heads!
I started reading blogs about adoption, specifically Ethiopia, and praying that God would turn Jeff’s heart in the adoption direction.  God did a mighty work in Jeff’s heart and after two and a half years and lots of prayer we started our journey.
On December 18, 2008 we faxed over our application to our adoption agency and jumped in with both feet to adopt a little boy, 1-3 years old.  From January, 2010 to May of that same year we worked tirelessly to compile our dossier and on May 22, 2010 we joined our agency’s wait list as #97.
Exactly 10 months later, on March 22, 2010, we got the call of our lives.  Our case worker had information and pictures of our son, it was our referral day!  Bereket Abota was 26 months old and a teeny tiny 16 pounds. One look at him and we knew he was who God intended to join our family!
On May 11, 2010 we passed court in Ethiopia and got a phone call that Bereket Abota was legally our son in the eyes of the Ethiopian Government.
June 17, 2010 we boarded the first of many planes that would take us to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia.  We spent a week in Ethiopia soaking up our child’s culture and bonding with our son.  On June 27 we landed at the airport and were greeted by 50 or so of our family and friends.  Our kids met their brother and we were a family of six!

That was just the beginning of our journey…

We’ve been home just over a year and it has been a year of intense joy and intense pain.  We brought home a very sad, scared and angry little boy.  He quickly became attached to us but at the turn of a hat would become violent, it was heartbreaking.  I am so blessed to say that the hurting little boy who came into our family is now a hilarious, spunky, goofy little guy that charms everyone in his path.  There is obviously still hurt in his heart but he’s processing it all and as he processes we get to hear about his life in Ethiopia, a true honor to hear.  It has been such a blessing in our family to help him grieve and learn to live in a structured family.  As a result we have become more compassionate and our kids have learned so much about loving people where they are at and loving with Christ’s unconditional love.

As Bereket was severely malnourished for almost three years of his life we knew that he would have some medical issues but we would quickly learn that we would spend multiple days a week going to doctor appointments.  We currently have eleven specialists and are preparing for his third and fourth surgeries.  My heart breaks when Bereket is in pain but I can’t help but think during each appointment what his life would have been like had he stayed in Ethiopia.  Through all of his medical issues we have learned to trust God daily, knowing that He has Bereket in His hands and He knows what our son needs.

Adoption begins in pain, a birth family making an excruciating decision.  But on the other side is a family who receives the gift of a lifetime.  In God’s amazing grace we have been given the honor of being Bereket’s family.  Not a day goes by that I don’t think back to that huge decision to adopt, and every time I think on it I am humbled that God chose us for this journey; a journey of love!

It turns out we did “need” a little boy from Africa… a little boy that would change the way our family looks at the world and move us to live our lives for others and not for ourselves!

Gladheim Family, photo taken in August 2010, shortly after we returned from Ethiopia with Bereket.

Bereket, photo taken in May 2011.

Christy’s Blog- check it out here.

By Sarah Viera of www.anoceansizedlove.blogspot.com

Coming from a rather large family I had always wanted to have children of my own. I had always pictured birthdays with handmade cakes and decorations, and singing over my babies. I pictured busy kitchens baking mini tarts with  my kids in little aprons  like I did with my mom and grandmother growing up. I pictured a dinner table full of conversation and chuckles. I didn’t have aspirations of being a career woman or doing many of the things my friends had done. I wanted to be a mom…

…And then my husband and I were told that we had about a 10 to a million chance of conceiving a child. Not great odds. We were both incredibly devastated by the news but as any woman with a passion I jumped {head in} to the fertility treatments. We had a round of IVF that ended in a painful tragedy and we were never the same.

My husband and I believe that things happen for a reason so we picked ourselves up and thought about adoption as a way to grow our family. We were ready to move forward, although very afraid of getting our hearts broken again. We filled out paper work, finished a home study and waited around for a few months. In late March of 2005 we got a call from our agency  that a birthmother had picked us and wanted to meet at her next doctors appointment.

We met the birthmother and knew right away that this was a match that was meant to be. We got to hear our baby boy’s heart beat that day. Over the next few months we fell in love with his kicks and spoke to him through the belly of a sweet woman who we will never forget. She chose us to be his parents and are so grateful!

Our hopeless and broken feelings turned into love, excitement and joy! In the middle of September that year we were there as our son came into the world and held him for the first time. Words cannot express the emotions that we felt looking into his face. My husband and I both knew that the journey was to bring us to this beautiful baby. It was all worth it in the moment that we looked into his eyes.

And our lives were full of birthday cakes, singing and chuckles at the table. As if that joy wasn’t enough, when our son was 18 months old, we found out about a baby girl that was due to be born in about 8 weeks time. We knew little about the situation. We prayed and felt that we should move forward with her adoption. We met her birthmother over lunch one day and realized again, it was meant to be. We brought our daughter home when she was a few days old after only about 6 weeks. We were barely ready but we knew from the moment we laid eyes on her, she was meant for us!

Now, many happy birthdays and merry family memories later we are starting the journey to China to meet our third child, our son who we lovingly call “little brother”. If I have learned anything from our adoption journeys it is to trust God completely, embrace the unknown and grow from pain. There have been many moments in my life when I’ve asked “why”. There have also been many moments when I have said “I see”. I know that God’s plan is greater. His love is greater. I am enjoying living out my dream of being a mother and it is a most wonderful dream come true!

-Sarah
www.iwanttobakeyouabirthdaycake.blogspot.com
www.anoceansizedlove.blogspot.com

How can you help this adoption family?

The Viera Family are currently raising money for their third adoption through an auction on their blog. “We are walking through faith that God will provide for this adoption.”  Here is a link: http://anoceansizedlove.blogspot.com/2011/08/ocean-sized-love-adoption-auction-items.html.

Our house was a flurry of excitement as we dreamed about holding our toddler boy in our arms.  We prayed diligently for him and his birth family.  Books about toddler adoption cluttered our nightstands as we gleaned all the information we could from them.

A few months passed and we had an agency change. It was discouraging to think about a longer wait time, but could see God’s hand moving and so we followed.  Over the Christmas season, God began to quietly press on our hearts a desire for two children.  We hashed through every angle as we had told that a twin referral was “like lightening striking” and because our age range was toddler and younger, a sibling group would be virtually impossible.  

Early January 2010, we sat listening to a man share his testimony of God’s faithfulness to him during his time with cancer and then the prayers of faith of many on his behalf and his subsequent, miraculous healing, our hearts were moved.  Jon and I went home and on Monday, we heard our dossier arrived in Ethiopia, we were on the waiting list! Monday night, we poured out our hearts before God, “Father, You are pressing on our hearts that we are supposed to bring home two children with this adoption, but Father, we lack faith, so we pray that You would work a miracle and bring us two children.  Give us the faith to believe You can do this!” We fell asleep, hunkering down for a long wait but peaceful that God was in control.

Two days later, I received a call from our social worker.  We chatted a bit and then she said, “Amy, one week old, twin sisters need a Mommy and Daddy.  Would you and Jon be open to looking at their information?” I fell to the floor in a puddle of tears and when I could contain myself enough to talk, all I could do was praise God.

April 2010, less then eleven months after God had moved us down the path of adoption, we traveled to Ethiopia to bring home our treasures, our 5 month-old, twin baby girls. We still have never heard an explanation about why we waited two days and then were matched with baby girls but not a day has passed in which we have not praised God for this double blessing!

“Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.” Ephesians 3:20-21

www.jonandamyg.blogspot.com

We’re often told that God has has a reason for allowing bad things to happen. It’s usually little comfort when trudging through seemingly awful circumstances. But it’s the hope and trust in what God is doing that carries us through, especially knowing we would never otherwise make it on our own strength.

But every once in a while, God shows us those reasons, and it is such a gift that it makes it impossible not to share with everyone.

It will be five years ago this December when we were expecting the birth of our firstborn, a little boy whom we decided to name Logan. His due date was December 10th. A Christmas baby.

Logan, however, had different plans. I was induced and delivered him on September 16th, a day after a middle-of-the-night rush to Labour and Delivery revealed that Logan had died in utero.

We held him, we prayed over him, and with tear-stained faces, handed him back to God.

We had just had our baby shower. We knew it was traditionally a few weeks early, but we wanted to have it over a three-day-weekend so that more out-of-town guests could come. While in the hospital my husband privately coordinated with friends and family to have all of our gifts removed from our apartment before we returned home.

Three days after coming back to an empty house I was admitted to the hospital with a heart rate of 32 beats per minute. To shorten a rather lengthy story, odds were really good that if I had carried my pregnancy to term my heart would not have made it. At that point it became glaringly obvious  why God had me deliver when I did. Although we could not understand why we lost our little boy, we were at least comforted with the knowledge that it was necessary for him to arrive early in order to save my life.

And so life went on. Our original plan was to have one birth child and adopt the rest. We had our birth child, for the little time that he was here with us. On the anniversary of his stillbirth, we were introduced to a woman who had foster-adopted through a local agency and were given their contact information. We were ready to move forward.

In fact, our living situation further encouraged growing our family. We had the opportunity to move from our one-bedroom apartment into the only two-bedroom unit in our building by the beach, graciously offered to us by the building’s owner. We moved, cleaned, and painted, leaving the spare room empty, a physical reminder of the hole in our family that we were seeking to fill.

My husband and I attended our foster-adoption orientation on October 6th. There we learned a number of things: Healthy, newborn babies were rare, so don’t expect one. The younger the child you want, the longer you will wait especially if you want a girl. And don’t expect a “Christmas baby.” For some reason the adoption agency gets a high rate of parents starting the adoption process right before Christmas, expecting their child to be home before the holiday. Interesting. All good things to know.

As much as we would have wanted a newborn, our hearts were open to whatever God had planned for us, so we embarked on our paperwork journey believing that we would probably end up with a sibling set of toddler (or older) boys.

For those who know me, it is no surprise that I finished our entire adoption packet in three weeks. I’m a paperwork junkie, and if there is one thing that I do well, it’s details. Besides, I had it in my head that the faster that I got my part in the adoption process completed, the faster that God could do His work in bringing our child (or children) home.

By mid-November (a month into the adoption process) our social worker finished our home visit for the homestudy, and I was left with nothing to do but wait for her to write it up and start the search process.

When pregnant mothers unpack their baby shower gifts, decorating and preparing the nursery for their babies, it’s called “nesting.” When a woman who just started the adoption process starts pulling out the gifts she received from the baby shower of her stillborn child, it’s called “crazy.”  But I just had it on my heart to put the crib together, to pull out the blankets and bottles and clothes. To have everything washed and to finally start filling that empty room. I’m not a very patient person so I needed to be doing something to help with the adoption process. And that was that was all I had at the time.

Our social worker was still working on writing up our homestudy, so we received calls from her from time to time asking for clarification of this or that. So it wasn’t a huge shock to have her call me early in December (2 months into the adoption process) while I was putting the final touches on our “spare room.” Before answering her call I remember looking around and thinking it finally felt like it could be a home for someone.

What was shocking about the call was that our social worker relayed that a healthy, negative-tox, newborn baby girl was relinquished at the hospital and she wanted to ask if we were interested in adopting her!

A relinquishment is when a birthmother did not make an adoption plan and relinquishes the baby at the hospital. Rarely are healthy babies reqlinquished nowadays, and even more rarely was our adoption agency the one that was called in such instances. As such, we were informed that time was of the essence, so we needed to make a decision fast.

My head was spinning. I had just finished putting away the baby clothes in the dresser of the spare room. The baby clothes that would have never have fit a toddler. I called my husband, who was teaching, so that we could quickly discuss the situation. Up until this call we had had our minds wrapped around having toddler boys. However, we were totally open to what God had planned for us. We decided to let our social worker know that we were interested in learning more and wanted to know how we should proceed. I hung up with my husband and was ready to call our social worker back.

And then it occurred to me. It was December 10th. One year, to the day, of our son’s original due date. And I wept. From that moment forward I knew in my heart that this was the plan that God had for us all along. This is why we had our baby shower early; we were going to need those baby things, just not when we thought we were going to. This was why I rushed to get the paperwork completed so quickly. This was why I was putting together a crib and washing baby clothes when everyone around me was rolling their eyes and shaking their heads. It wasn’t just a child that God had planned for us. It was this child, and everything needed to happen exactly when it did in order for us to receive her.

We had to submit our homestudy for her, along with several other hopeful parents. And our social worker had to pull an all-nighter just to write ours up to be considered. It took three days before we heard that we were chosen to be her forever family.  When we asked what we were supposed to do next, she said “Come pick her up.”

And that was the day we met our daughter. She was six days old, healthy, and beautiful. Although she was African American, she had a full head face of freckles. I have freckles, myself, and I loved the fact that she did too.  Although they have long since faded, I like to think that God placed those freckles on her for the sole purpose of allowing me something about her to which I could immediately bond.

Her birthmother had 2 weeks to change her mind. Those two weeks ended on Christmas Eve. When we awoke Christmas morning we knew for certain she was here to stay. On the very day that God’s son was born, so was our family.

Sometimes God gives a reason for why bad things happen. By walking in faith and obedience, when one child was taken away, another was given. If Logan were to have lived, we most certainly would have adopted. We just wouldn’t have adopted this little girl. And this little girl was so clearly the one whom the Lord wanted for us to have.

We called her Zoe, which means “alive,” not so much for the fact that she was the living of the two children with whom the Lord blessed us, but because without the hope that lived within us during this whole experience we never would have known her.