My Life Is Crazy Too is a new series of reader submissions. This is your opportunity to share stories about life, love, and mommyhood to provide understanding, hope, and compassion in the unique situations each of us face every day. If you would like to submit a story to this series, email me. Today’s crazy guest is our SUPER-nanny, Dovie White!!!!!!

GODS TIMING IS PERFECT … It’s a promise that we can stand on.

Kari asked me to tell my story. To tell the world about God’s faithfulness in my life and how he brought me here to Addis.

It really began three summers ago. I was sitting on my bed shortly after school had ended my softmore year, contemplating weather to work at Cold Stone again or try something new, when I started begging and pleading with God that he take me out of the country.I longed to go on an adventure! Then I allowed myself to compromise and pleaded for at least something long term, even if it was still in the country, and eventually just that he would bring me a NEW opportunity. He was quick to answer by allowing me to be a nanny KAA for the Janke family. It was a month long job that ended up being EXACTLY what I needed that summer. It was the perfect amount of time, for the perfect amount of money, with the most perfect family for that time in my life.

What I did not understand then, was that God still heard my FIRST plea to travel the world, it just wasn’t time yet.

Fast Forward to the beginning of my senior year, my sweet friend Alex Snyder asked me to lead a bible study with her, for freshman girls. This is something we had been given as freshmen, and something we wanted to give as seniors. We wanted to invest in younger girls and be mentors, because we had been blessed with that gift by girls before us. However, the beginning of my senior year when Alex approached me about getting a group started, I was not quite feeling up to par. I had heard a thousand times though, “if you wait till you feel ready, you’ll wait forever.” So the small group began and I came to know Hannah Gibson and her family.

Since her brother and I graduated in the same class, I had mingled with them a few times over the years but never got to know them personally. The small group really sparked our friendship and gave us the foundations for a now “family” like relationship. Throughout the year I still felt less than awesome as a leader but was constantly encouraged by Alex, and my family and the girls! We ended up growing really close and meeting weekly to hang out and pray together.

One night probably in March, I ran into the Gibsons at my favorite Chinese restaurant, Panda House. We chit chatted for a while and Kari casually mentioned, “We are really hoping you join us this summer in Ethiopia as a nanny. Oh is that Lo Mein? Well we better head back to our table…” I was sure she wasn’t serious. That sounded too good to be true! But, sure enough, a week later she called me to ask formally  if I would come with them this summer to be a nanny for Zoe and a friend for Hannah, and to help them both with the transition. She told me right up front that they wanted to cover the expenses and that she wanted to meet with my family soon to discuss it! AND, that they had hardly any for sure details and that it would certainly be an adventure!

I was ECSTATIC! I hurried and told my parents who were 100% on board and amazed at such a wonderful blessing!

Then it started getting sticky, one thing after another sent Plan A (Three month adventure living and serving in Addis Ababa) further and further away. The house wouldn’t sell, the job wouldn’t end, the finances weren’t there yet. It looked doubtful. Kari eventually called me to tell me that it wasn’t going to happen. I was heartbroken for them, and sad I wouldn’t get to travel. Continue Reading

My Life Is Crazy Too is a new series of reader submissions. This is your opportunity to share stories about life, love, and mommyhood to provide understanding, hope, and compassion in the unique situations each of us face every day. If you would like to submit a story to this series, email me. Today’s crazy guest is  Meredith Howard.

Sometimes LIFE is Bizarre.  That is the best way I can sum up our story…..Just Bizarre.  Just God!

In 2010, after the Haitian Earthquake, my husband and I decided it was time to pursue our long time desire to adopt.  We had talked about it for years, but decided it was time to actually DO something…not just keep talking about it.  We spoke with our 3 children (at the time ages 2,4,6) about wanting to adopt.  As best as they could understand, they were supportive.  We began pursuing an adoption from Ethiopia.  Our “plan” was to adopt a little toddler age girl.   No more diapers, we thought, and no babies.  Been there, done that 3 times.

During the process- at my husband’s insistence- we got certified as foster parents as well.  He just really believed that if there were children in the US who needed homes, we should start there.  Long story short, we got a call about our sweet foster daughter- Nancy- and had to make a decision in about 5 minutes (before meeting her) if we would want to be her parents.  Birth parent rights were just about terminated.  This was going to be a “done deal.”  We said yes, and piled our 3 kiddos into the minivan to drive an hour north to meet her.  She was precious.   Our 3 bio children fell in love with her immediately.  I ran out and rented Chris Rock’s movie “Good Hair” so I could learn to do African American hair.

After 3 months with us, and her calling my husband “Daddy!  Daddy!” she ended up being taken away from us (that is a whole other blog post in and of itself!).  We were heartbroken.  BUT, in our heart ache we knew this was the confirmation we needed to pursue international adoption. Continue Reading

My Life Is Crazy Too is a new series of reader submissions. This is your opportunity to share stories about life, love, and mommyhood to provide understanding, hope, and compassion in the unique situations each of us face every day. If you would like to submit a story to this series, email me. Today’s crazy guest is . {updated with new family photos}

I started thinking about this as we were completing our second adoption. Fund-raising. And can I just say we did a lot of fund-raising, which was probably what made me think long and hard about it—coffee, t-shirts, celebration cards, garage sales, silent auctions—and I’m sure I left something out. Oh, yeah, begging. But that doesn’t count, does it?
With the adoption of our first son from Ethiopia we weren’t very schooled in fundraising, so we didn’t really make any grand attempts at it. Yet we were still blessed to bring Micah home without incurring any debt. I was working part-time, which helped a little. And we had some very special Brothers and Sisters in the Lord make some very generous donations toward our adoption expenses, which helped a lot!!

Even still with our second adoption I think I lost a little faith. God did such miracles to bring our Micah home that I really just expected to have to suck it up with Judah. So the fund-raising ensued.
But something really started to haunt me as we pursued different fund-raising efforts. I was asking others to give toward our adoption, but what was I willing to give?? Or maybe give up is the better question. I’m a stay-at-home mom and my husband is a minister, so we don’t have much expendable income that we just blow. Our cars are older, and paid for. We don’t take luxurious vacations. We never spend more than $20 when we eat out. I don’t own a pair of jeans that cost more than $35. So there’s really no where to cut back. Right? Continue Reading

It’s such an honor to have my share his new quest, 127 Warrior with my readers! I have watched God do mighty miracles in his life and can’t wait to see what adventures He has planned for our family. If you enjoy this post or learn something crazy, please go grab your hubby and encourage him join the 127 Warrior movement. We have Man Up mission trips planned this summer (open spots!!) with several wonderful organizations, as well as the Man Up and Go movie, and conference coming soon!! It’s time to Man Up – protect and love the fatherless … living James 1:27 in a radical way.

My Life Is Crazy Too is a new series of reader submissions. This is your opportunity to share stories about life, love, and mommyhood to provide understanding, hope, and compassion in the unique situations each of us face every day. If you would like to submit a story to this series, email me. Today’s crazy guest is Roger Gibson.

What does a modern-day warrior look like? I recently saw the movie Acts of Valor. It was a total dude flick. No Hollywood actors. The actors were real life Navy Seal action heroes. It was the kind of movie where 40 year olds get to live out their warrior fantasies by watching these bad asses pulverize the enemy on the big screen. Hooyah!

Acts of Valor is about a Navy Seal Seven unit that is deployed to rescue a captured CIA agent behind enemy lines and defend the borders of the United States by keeping suicide bombers from entering. For me, a modern-day warrior operates very much like a Navy Seal, but in James 1:27 style. What does a 127 Warrior look like? As men, we are naturally wired to protect! In the book, The Male Brain the author called this hormone “Vasopressin the White Knight.” Vasopressin is the reason for our gallantry and monogamy. It makes us aggressively protect and defend our turf, mate, and children. Along with testosterone, vasopressin runs the male brain circuit.  A 127 Warrior is a man who is able to look beyond his own wall to Man Up for the fatherless. I know as men we instinctively know that we are supposed to protect our home, spouse, and kids but outside of our own very “wall” what does that look like? Unfortunately, four years ago I didn’t have a clue. Continue Reading

My Life Is Crazy Too is a new series of reader submissions. This is your opportunity to share stories about life, love, and mommyhood to provide understanding, hope, and compassion in the unique situations each of us face every day. If you would like to submit a story to this series, email me.  Today’s crazy guest is Kara Vassar.

When we were on our adoption journey, we wanted to feel connected to Ethiopia during our wait.  So, we got our hands on a Yezelalem Minch documentary. We heard that our adoption agency helps this orphan/widow care ministry in Ethiopia.   My husband and I watched it. I cried! We were amazed, in awe, saddened, and yet hopeful. In the movie, the visionary Birtukan and founder Nesibu were such an inspiration. They are truly the Hands and Feet of Christ in Ethiopia. The very next day, I sponsored a boy from Yezelalem Minch (YZM).  I knew in my heart that I would help them spread their ministry someday. But, at the moment, our adoption journey was 1st priority.  Within 6 months after we brought our 2 children home, I was offered a FREE pass for a week long Christian music festival (a festival that has been in my town for years, yet NEVER attended).  At this festival the Lord spoke to my heart saying, “it is time to help Yezelalem Minch and be their voice”.  I had NO idea what I was doing but I felt I could start by sharing their story on facebook.  To move people’s hearts, you have to show them a need and how they can make a difference.  I thought sharing the Yezelalem Minch documentary was the answer.  After contacting the director, I had copies made and started sending them out free.  The response was amazing!  I was overwhelmed by how so many people stepped up to help these Yezelalem Minch children in Ethiopia.  Now, there are so many YZM advocates throughout the US that children are being sponsored on a more regular basis.   Praise God for this miracle.  Nesibu, Birtukan and YZM staff do all the hard work by making sure their 1300 children are cared for, loved and valued as our very own children are. Continue Reading

Alexandra won the Mission Trip Giveaway!!

Back in January, my friend’s mother (whose church sponsors the Ludlati carepoint in Swaziland with Children’s HopeChest) posted about a trip to Swaziland that was going on this summer. I did some research on Swaziland and saw the high number of orphans and the AIDS infection rate. The life expectancy in Swaziland is only around thirty years. All of this astounded me and I felt this huge push to go on this trip.

There was also a spiritual side to my desire to go on this trip and it’s explained in my post called Jesus on Purpose (http://givingbackthebighalf.blogspot.com/2012/03/jesus-on-purpose.html). It’s a bit of a long post but explains a lot of important things about my heart and God.

When I learned how much it would cost for me to be able to get to Swaziland, I was slightly terrified. However, the team leader assured me that he had seen God provide for everyone who was truly interested in these service trips. He had faith that the funding would come through and so I decided to commit to finding a way to go.

I told my friends and family and got immediate support. They encouraged me to start a blog so I could journal my experiences before and after the trip. Within a few days of learning about my trip, I had people doing bakesales for me and selling jewelry. People were sacrificing their time, energy, and resources to make my desire to serve in Swaziland a reality. Continue Reading

Everyone deserves CLEAN Water!

My Life Is Crazy Too is a new series of reader submissions. This is your opportunity to share stories about life, love, and mommyhood to provide understanding, hope, and compassion in the unique situations each of us face every day. If you would like to submit a story to this series, email me. Today’s crazy guest is Julie Neal.

My best friend, Juju is an exceptional preschool teacher and famous for her cake baking skills, but what she is most recognized for is her passion for clean water! She has worked fervently for the past three years to bring clean water to the village of Chuko, where her adopted son’s birth family lives in rural Ethiopia. She asked all of us to join her today celebrating World Wide Water Day!! Here’s what you can do to dig deep … this is Julie’s story.

I (Julie) know that I take for granted that at any moment I can access water from many places in my home. We turn on the faucet, dishwasher, washing machine and expect water to be there. Over a million people in the world to not have water. They walk for miles to collect DIRTY water to meet all of their needs. Eighty percent of all illness are from water borne diseases. This is horrible that in this century, people are still having to live like this!! Continue Reading

Over the past three years, I have received hundreds of guest posts from you, my crazy readers. These are your real stories and you inspire me, encourage me, and fill my heart with compassion as we embrace the unique situations each of us face in life. I learn from you…. you are beautiful, kind, smart and important!! I know … quoting The Help is kinda corny, but I mean it! I’m starting a brand new series to compile all your submissions in one “easy to find” spot- My Life Is Crazy Too. I’m going back through the years and including your guest posts to the series to make it overflowing with stories you can re-read and share. I want you to tell us your story. This is a 100% mom blog that wears a lot of hats… we support and cheer for moms, advocate for adoption, and take care of the fatherless living James 1:27. This blog is ALL about sharing real life stories about how crazy life gets- the good, the bad, and the crazy in life, love, and mommyhood. As a mom, I need daily encouragement from other moms, sometimes just to make it through my day with a 18, 15, and 4 year old! My Crazy Adoption is not just about encouraging parents through the adoption journey…. but so much more!

Last week, one of my best friends went through a miscarriage. It was so heartbreaking watching her go through the agony of losing a child. It brought me back to the terrible day we held our son when he died. The pain of loss is so severe that the only thing you really want to hear from your family and friends … I’m so sorry!! The joy now in my life, I can share from my own experiences …. I didn’t have to ask her what she needed, I already knew. Every loss is different, but the pain is the same. I wish like crazy she wasn’t a part of the “club” of moms who have lost a child, but this is real life. God adopted us and promised us that He will never leave us or abandon us. He will walk with us through the pain and craziness of life. Continue Reading

One of my favorite things (as a mom blogger) is when men speak up and want to share on my blog. I appreciated this post from my friend, Caleb David-  Machine Gun Camera here and thought this would be another cool perspective on short term mission trip. My guest, Ben Singleton, really challenged me to look deeply in the heart of what Jesus considers “wasteful.” I want you to feel like your growing and gaining greater understanding when you have the opportunity to go and share the gospel with the world’s unreached people groups- there IS a place for long or short term missionaries- mission-hearted people that want to simply love and live James 1:27 in a crazy way. I want to know your thoughts after you read this new post. This is a crazy reason to encourage your hubbys, brothers, uncles, and friends to Man Up and Go. Don’t forget to come over bright and early on March 5th to My Crazy Adoption and enter to WIN a mission trip with Tom Davis’ Children’s HopeChest ministry!!!! Mark your calendars!

I just read your post and the last couple from Tom Davis. There seemed to be a common theme so I thought I would weigh in…

First of all, I think the conversation about short-term mission trips vs. long-term holistic solutions should be started in scripture.  Matthew 25 provides crystal clear support for meeting urgent (short-term) needs.  Jesus recognizes his own by their response to hunger, thirst, nakedness, imprisonment, etc.  It is important to note the response that Christ affirms as “knowing Him” is embodied in giving a drink, a meal, a shirt, or a visit.  He doesn’t necessarily ask for holistic solutions, economic development, not even (interestingly) any preaching, teaching, or theology lessons.  What lessons can we take from this?  First, the obvious message is that if we truly indwelt by the Spirit of God, we will see people (especially “the least of these”) with love & compassion in a way that make’s their needs more important to us than our own agendas.  Second, the gospel can be clearly and effectively communicated to the lost and hurting by our attitudes and actions if we truly love God and love others as ourselves.  Third, each of us is not called to solve every problem under the sun, rather we are called to respond with love and compassion to needs that God puts in front of us.

It saddens me deeply to see people who are deeply committed to the ideas of compassion and justice diminish the value of short-term responses to deep, urgent, legitimate needs.  While we are all called to be good stewards of the abundant riches God has poured out on us, it is just as important not to lose sight of what God considers good stewardship.  For example, Judas chastised Mary for “wasting” expensive perfume anointing Jesus’ feet instead of giving it to the poor, but Christ sided with Mary’s action.  By all worldly standards, Judas was correct that it would be more prudent to sell the perfume for the benefit of the poor, but this was not God’s purpose for the perfume.  This account rings in my ears every time I hear believers criticize the “effectiveness” of Spirit-led acts of compassion.  Other examples that God’s accounting systems don’t work like the world’s are found in the Good Shepard leaving the ninety-nine just to find the one, or the poor widow whose two small coins were “more” than large bags given by rich people.

I have also heard people criticize the “wastefulness” of the thousands of dollars required for each participant to undertake a short-term mission trip; the common sentiment being that funds could be more effectively used in other ways to benefit the least of these.  Again, an empty bottle of perfume pops into my mind.  But so does the fact that almost all of us spend money to take a vacation every year, an act that is probably just as expensive and yet roundly accepted and even encouraged.  Why is a trip to Africa condemned as wasteful when a trip to the Bahamas is much needed break from our demanding lives?  The answer, I believe, is that the source of attacks on the prudence of short-term trips mission is the father of lies himself.  Let’s look at this another way.  Imagine that your best friend lives on the other side of the country and is diagnosed and hospitalized with advanced pancreatic cancer.  What would you do?  Your first response wouldn’t be to work overtime so you could send money to help with his medical bills, to make a donation to the American Cancer Society, or to start doing your own research in a desperate attempt to find a cure.  Obviously you would go see him, even if the trip cost a lot of money, required you be away from your family for a short time, take time off work, etc.  The same is true with short-term missions.  It is an entirely appropriate response to the love and compassion that Spirit gives us for orphans in Africa, for example, to go and be with them.

There are even camps of people who criticize adoption because it doesn’t solve the root causes of the orphan crisis.  Again, the enemy must surely be the source of these ideas because ADOPTION IS THE GOSPEL as clearly demonstrated in Ephesians 1.  There could have been no more holistic solution to the suffering of three of “the least of these” who now call me Dad.

On the other hand, Isaiah 58 instructs us to loose the chains of injustice, set the oppressed free, to spend ourselves on behalf of the hungry, to satisfy the needs of the oppressed, and to be repairers and restorers.  None of these directive can be accomplished in the short-term.  Accomplishing these Kingdom purposes requires time, wisdom, resources, and commitment in addition to the love and compassion required in Matthew 25.  The problem with focusing solely holistic solutions to fixing broken nations is two-fold.  First without the simple, compassionate love of Matthew 25, Christ-followers will not have the staying power to affect long-term change, and without first going, seeing, listening and living the pain of the least of these, Christ-followers will have the wisdom to understand the problems. Second, some of the least of these simply cannot wait for a long-term solution (revisiting again the wisdom of leaving the ninety-nine just to find the one).  Christ conquered BIG problems like sin and death, and he told us to solve big problems like poverty, oppression, suffering, hunger, thirst, and injustice.  I think it is worth while to note that before Jesus conjured the grave, he fed thousands, hugged lepers, ate supper with prostitutes and thieves, celebrated with friends, wept with the mourning, loved children, spoke the truth, and offered the Kingdom of God to all.  There is nothing wrong with his children doing the same smaller things before accomplishing the bigger ones.  

If you enjoyed or learned something from this post- please share it!

I wanted to personally introduce this amazing couple …. Brady and Lisa Stark are dear friends of ours! We go to the same church, as well as serve together on the mission field. They are both leading a May 17-28th mission trip (with Cherrie Cornish) to Ethiopia with Visiting Orphans – if you want to join the team there is space available. The first time I met Brady, I was a little intimidated. He’s a cop and security for the church staff on Sunday mornings. He’s very serious on the outside, but I could also see his big heart. Lisa told me that her hubby’s life was changed going on a mission trip and I’m thrilled to share their story to encourage you today! This is a very personal testimony and I hope you’ll spread them some support and love in the comments.

My Life Is Crazy Too is a new series of reader submissions. This is your opportunity to share stories about life, love, and mommyhood to provide understanding, hope, and compassion in the unique situations each of us face every day. If you would like to submit a story to this series, email me. Today’s crazy guest is Lisa Stark.

God doesn’t change, but He can sure change us.  He can change our focus in life, our direction of decisions, and even our marriage. That’s what God did in our life and our marriage.  He picked us up and redirected our course of life.

The beginning of our story is not unique.  Brady and I have been married for 20 years now, but the majority of these years were spent in struggle, division, and isolation.  We were living under the same roof but the only unity it seemed like we had in our marriage was our foundation in Christ.

We attended church regularly, and volunteered in various ministries in our church, but something was missing.  For many years, I was the spiritual leader in our family.  I developed a close relationship with God and He became so real to me.  But it seemed like Brady was very content to remain constant in his walk with the Lord.  He did not seem to want, or need, a closer relationship with God.  Brady was content where he was.

This went on for many years.  Then in 2007, Brady sensed a stirring within himself that God wanted him to do more.  This stirring consisted of a quiet thought that kept coming to him about disaster relief and medical aide.  From that, Brady started praying for direction from God.  Brady finished his bachelor degree and decided to apply for PA (physician assistant) school.

In October 2008, I took my first mission trip to Venezuela and it changed my life.  This trip was a construction / medical based trip.  While on that trip, I sensed God’s calling to become a medical provider to the poor and to those in need.  After returning home, I approached Brady about God’s leading.  I was somewhat apprehensive about pursuing this calling because I did not want Brady to feel like I was in competition with him by returning to school also.  Brady was very supportive and in agreement with this leading.  I applied to the nurse practitioner program at SLU and started in January 2009.

Meanwhile, Brady applied but was not accepted into the PA program.  This rejection into the program was huge to Brady.  He questioned whether or not he even heard from God to begin with.  Brady struggled with why God would lead him this far, only to have a closed door.  It was during this time of struggle and questioning that I said to Brady, “God has something special for you.  Maybe it’s just a matter of timing.”  Those words resonated with Brady; and still do to this day.

During that time of trying to figure out what he was going to do, now that he wasn’t going to the PA program, I signed Brady up for a mission trip to Africa.  Surprisingly, Brady decided to go.

Brady served on that trip and came home a changed man.  God revealed Himself to Brady in a miraculous way.  Brady experienced suffering, hunger, sorrow, illness, poverty, abandonment, and thirst.  He also experienced a physical healing of a young woman after members of the team prayed over her.  Brady experienced God’s presence in a land of brokenness.  And then God broke Brady’s heart.

Brady came home from that trip a different man.  And he has never been the same.  God became real.  So real, that God became Brady’s focus.  That change in focus brought about change in our decision-making.  From those decisions, changes in our marriage occurred as a result.

Our eyes were opened.  We wanted to serve our God, by serving those in need:  the broken, the sick, and the lost.  When our focus to serve God in this capacity occurred, a unity in our marriage occurred.  We became one heart, a heart for God.  Christ was no longer just the foundation of our marriage.  He was the walls, the windows, the door, and the roof.  God used our service on a mission trip to change the focus and the direction of our lives.  We both went on separate trips, at separate times, and both came back changed people.

I prayed for many years for a whole marriage, a unified marriage.  I prayed for many years for God to reveal Himself to Brady in a powerful way.  I prayed for many years for God to use me, for God to change me.  God doesn’t change.  He hears our prayers and gives us our hearts’ desires.  He has a way of molding our hearts’ desire to become a desire to serve Him.

And yes, it was all a matter of timing.  Brady applied again for PA school and was accepted into the program.  I graduated last year and now work as a nurse practitioner in an underserved area.  After Brady graduates, we hope to serve in Africa; whether it be a disaster or whether it be the disaster of poverty, our hearts’ desire is to work in the mission field as medical providers.  To give not only medicines and health care, but most importantly, to give eternal hope to those in need.

Brady returned to Africa six months later on another mission trip.  But this time he took our son with him.  As Brady stood in the dump in Korah, he realized God’s plan.  As he stood in the muck, the decay, surrounded by the hurting and the hungry, he wept.  He was in God’s presence.  God was there.  Brady would give up everything he owned now to serve his Lord.  It was no longer about the cars, the money, or the ‘things’ of life.  He experienced a glimmer of God and he didn’t want to be anywhere else.

All because of prayer.  All because of a mission trip.  “And I will give you a new heart and a new spirit I will put within you…”  Ezekiel 36: 26a.

Guest Blogger- Caleb David

Machine Gun Camera: A Philosophy in Short-Term Missions

Let’s clear the air. The world of short-term missions has been rocked recently with many new thoughts, blogs, missionaries and scholars.  I’m not writing to defend the camp that seems to think that all short-term mission trips are destructive, nor am I siding with those who are stuck doing things “the way they have always been done” and are offended at the other viewpoint and prefer the distance of being behind the machine gun camera.  The point of this article is to help us discover that we need each other and that it can be done in a holistic and effective way. I do not consider myself a revolutionary and am aware that there is nothing new under the sun, but we can find new ways to engage and apply the resources and wisdom that is already available to us.

I grew up as a preacher’s kid and spent several years as a child in India and the course of my life led me to work for a great short-term missions organization called Big World Ventures (www.bigworld.org) for many years in which we facilitated thousands on trips. The next phase of life came after we adopted our daughter, Sakari, from Ethiopia and on a vision trip back to Africa with Children’s Hopechest (www.hopechest.org), the Lord spoke clearly for us to launch a unique hybrid of short and long term missions while engaging individuals, ministry partnerships and communities – One Child Campaign.

Our philosophy: We believe that the purpose of short-term trips are to create awareness, build Kingdom-minded relationships, successful partnerships, funnel resources with accountability, give voice and facilitate sustainable solutions while connecting communities long-term.  This is accomplished through many creative streams and strategic partnerships. The trip is not the end result – the real work begins once we get back home. The goal is to be as invisible as possible and empower the local churches, missionaries and communities to continue the work seamlessly even after the team leaves. This means working within the appropriate cultural and ministry structure and being willing to never be recognized for our efforts.

To be honest, I totally get what the seemingly jaded long-term missionary is saying because of their encounters and the overall structure of “traditional” short-term team trips.  They have to deal with the effects of those who drop in but exit as quickly as they come. The other side is that short-term teams have the potential to raise awareness, bring resources and encourage those who are putting it all on the line daily. I’d like to establish what a short-term trip should NOT be: a poverty tour, a yearly penance to feel good about ourselves, a quick fix for our elusions of heroism, or a way to fill a hole in our identity. Are we secure enough in our calling and identity to never get an ounce of credit? Each of us must use our areas of influence with purpose and dignity, with a sense of awareness of each other.

We have to think beyond the 10-14 days of our time in a nation – beyond handing out candy, evangelical tracts and putting on drama performances and crusades. Now, before I’m called a heretic, I’m not saying those things are wrong, but I’m asking us to re-evaluate our initial integration into a foreign culture. I humbly ask you to think deeper than the surface of someone repeating a prayer after you. We must make disciples (the concept of multiplication) and that takes time, trust and truth. We must model consistency in our love. We go because we love Him and His people. Any other motivation is wrong.  

Everything in our lives ultimately goes back to our identity. In order to be effective we must first know who we are and know that we can hear and follow the voice of the Good Shepherd. He has called us to love and perfect love casts out all fear. He came to seek and save that which was lost. What was lost?? Communion and relationship with God – we are to be ministers of reconciliation, not heroes with good PR. The Gospels make it very clear that we are to go, but I think that many times we focus on the action of going and not on the attitude or the aftermath of our actions while we are there. We must constantly check the motivation of our hearts and look past the marketing, the budgets and conferences.

I believe that the church is finally waking up to its responsibility for social justice. I believe the next revival that we will see will be one of compassion and justice. Both of those words require the awareness of a need and an action to bring reconciliation or peace. Tim Keller shares in his book, Generous Justice, “In general, to “do justice” means to lives in a way that generates a strong community where human beings can flourish. Specifically, however, to “do justice” means to go to places where the fabric of shalom has broken down, where the weaker members of societies are falling through the fabric, and to repair it. This happens when we concentrate and meet the needs of the poor. How can we do that? The only way to reweave and strengthen the fabric is by weaving yourself into it.”

It can be intimidating, so do we just sit home in fear that we will do the wrong thing? I submit to you a resounding “no!” Where does our heart, mind and spirit need to be when we are about to step foot onto a plane when God calls us to go? We will start more discussion on this subject in our next post and offer some practical tips that will help you to prepare for your next trip. The Father clearly lets us know the harvest is ready in Matthew 9:35-38. We need to keep short-term trips going but lay down our own agendas, take the time to engage those who are there on the front lines fighting every day and use their wisdom and experience to forge an effective strategy together.

Yes, the trip will change you but remember it’s really not about you. Before you book your plane ticket and embark on a life changing adventure, commit to putting on the cloak of humility, walking in wisdom and lifting up the name of Jesus, so that all men would be drawn unto Him not just through your words, but primarily through your selfless love in action. 

One Child Campaign

www.onechildcampaign.com

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Our adoption story began 8 years ago when our friends adopted their son from Guatemala. God started a fire in our hearts for orphans. Both my husband and I knew, we would one day adopt. We have four biological daughters and one son who passed away as an infant. I felt very strongly that we were meant to adopt a son.

After years of praying and doors closing, we finally began the process of a domestic adoption. We attended classes, we did our paperwork, we created our family profile and we waited. In June of 2010, I felt strongly in my spirit that something was happening, but our call didn’t come. In December 2010, we began to feel called to Africa. We began the process of updating our home study and finding out more information. In January, we made the decision that we would accept boy/girl twins. It seemed silly at the time because it’s so rare to adopt twins. Not to mention, we already had four children at home. Adding two children through adoption would make us crazy right? Three days after we made that decision, we got an email from a friend that changed our lives forever……

“Are you interested in adopting 18 month old boy/girl twins?”

We said yes without hesitation. We started communicating with the agency that had the twins’ file and got more information about them and their history. We found out that they were brought into the orphanage in June 2010. Remember that little feeling I had? We also found out how much it was going to cost to pursue their adoption. My husband is self-employed, and I am a stay-at-home mom. It was our slow time at work and we had just lost our biggest account. We did not have 30k for the adoption. It seemed like the worst possible timing. But we prayed and talked about it. And my husband said, “I believe God is asking us to step out in faith.”

The next day we began looking into adoption grants. Within a week we were approved for a grant and a loan. That just doesn’t happen often!!! Our daily pray was, “Lord, if you keep opening doors, we will keep walking.”

Things looked like they would move quickly and we would travel within just a couple of months. However, that was not God’s plan. It has almost been a year since we saw their faces and we haven’t met them yet. To say that it has been a painful wait would be a gross understatement.

We have had so many signs from the Lord, that this is the path we are to be walking. But I wont lie and say that it has been easy. It’s been hard. Satan’s attacks have been many. The tears have flown frequently. And I know that it will probably get more intense. Leaving my girls here while we fly to Africa for several weeks is something that I try not to dwell on. This is tough stuff.

But what I want you to take away from our story, is that this is not our story. It’s God’s story. We are just a small part of the puzzle. And I am just so thankful to be a part of it. He has grown us more than I can ever say.

We have learned so much about adoption. We have learned so much about ourselves. We have had so many incredible people step in and help us walk this road. We have seen God open doors where we didn’t even know they existed. Between fundraising and grants, we have raised 18k towards this adoption. It’s incredible to say the least.

These precious children who live on the other side of the world, have changed us. They have grown us. I can’t even describe the joy that I have at the thought of bringing these little ones into our family soon. Please join us in praying them home.

We have set up a charity site that makes it super easy for people to donate for our adoption. 

In HIS Grip, Audrey
Blog: The Brown Brigade

I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

First off thank you KARI for letting us share part of our story while she is serving in Haiti.  You don’t probably know me—a mom from Austin MN, an Assistant Principal at a local middle school with a son and a great husband-but you might know a story like mine or know someone going through this time in their life.

I was in a deep pit.

Yes, I know it is easier to look back, dust yourself off and be relieved after it is all over-but this is not what I am writing about today-I am telling about when I was in it, scrambling to get out, looking at everyone else around me looking down at me-unsure how to respond, how to help, and how to help me heal.

It started in July of 2010 with this picture:

We had begun our adoption process in January of the same year-with thoughts of waiting 2-3 years for the referral of a 3-4 year old boy from Ethiopia.  Instead we received a referral before the ink was dry on our home study!  He was beautiful-I knew his name, and his story and I loved him!  I didn’t think that type of love could come from a picture-but it did.  My husband and our son Kenny loved M from the start-we started dreaming about what our life would be like with M in it-all the challenges and changes that would come.

Then the wait started.

First we hit the court closure in Ethiopia, and then some of our paperwork had to be changed.  I watched the agency updates daily..waiting…wondering “when is it our turn”.  Finally December 22nd, 2010-6 months after accepting the referral we received our court date-early March 2011.
As my husband and I walked out of court in Ethiopia we were so excited-the judge had “approved” our case on the spot!  According to timelines I followed we were to expect to return to Ethiopia in early June to bring our son home-maybe even before his 5th birthday!  We would have the summer to adjust (and he could adjust to Minnesota weather before the “snow”) and hopes to start him in preschool in the fall so he would be Kindergarten ready for 2012.  I can remember 1 week after returning buying these outfits and starting the suitcase for him.  I can also remember thanking God for “passing” us right away-out of the 11 families that traveled together-only 4 passed at court-I kept thinking that I couldn’t have handled not passing right away-God knew what I could handle…right?

Then everything changed.

We received a call from our Social Worker-a piece of paperwork was not being released, we were no longer approved and had to wait for this letter-not to worry, should take no longer than a month.

No letter in March, April, May, or June.  By this time 7 families had already traveled out of the 11 and brought their children home.  The judge wrote another firm letter to require the release of the letter for our son.  We celebrated his 5th birthday without him.

July-our agency called to tell us that 2 of the 4 letters needed had been released…ours was not one of the letters.  And he had been suddenly moved due to and orphanage closure, hoping for updates on his health soon-as I had been waiting since early April for height/weight updates-something I cherished as a way to picture him now…one year after his referral picture.

Late July-almost a year since referral-we finally passed!  Letters had been released, now people were traveling to get him and bring him to the Capitol City-maybe October Embassy??  Fall in Minnesota is beautiful and we would be together for the Holidays!

Another slip into the pit….

Days went by for the call that he was in the Capitol city-then the call…. the one no one wants…the one that they say “We are waiting to get your husband on the line before we start” even typing this I still get teary eyed and my heart races.  The call where they tell you due to some unforeseen issues-we don’t think this adoption will go through.

My heart truly had been broken- I did not understand, the tears flowed as we met with our Pastor-as I walked into school and brought our son home to tell him, as I figured out a way to get up the next morning, and the one after that, and to keep breathing and praying for him to be loved-by anyone-for me.

Prayer given via email to our Church Members:

Pastor Mike has requested prayer for Rob & Jess Cabeen and Kenny. Their adoption was terminated. Please pray for wisdom and comfort.

Psalm 71:20-22

New Living Translation (NLT)

20 You have allowed me to suffer much hardship,
but you will restore me to life again
and lift me up from the depths of the earth.
21 You will restore me to even greater honor
and comfort me once again.

22 Then I will praise you with music on the harp,
because you are faithful to your promises, O my God.
I will sing praises to you with a lyre,
O Holy One of Israel.

God is a wonderful, trusting God-looking back these times in the past year was dark, I mean DARK.  I had never been so low in my life…but I don’t think I had ever been so close to God either.  I reached for him while running everyday; I looked for him in the eyes of African children in the school I worked at.  I cried with him while playing drums in our worship band, I reached out for him through wonderful people like Kari Gibson, Jenn Hatmaker, and Amanda Herdina (Visiting Orphans) and I learned from him through our care group at church and bible studies.  Now I am able to tell you the truth—I question him-daily, maybe hourly at times.  “Why us?  Why him?  What did we do wrong?” I cried regularly for M, for our lives.  Each holiday or grief marker I cried for what I had lost, it was truly the roughest time in my life.

But He gave me strength.

Each day after that day in August 2011 I felt him with me, carrying me through the tough times.  He helped me to type the emails to the other families-congratulating them on their new addition, letting them know how happy we are for them-and not to feel bad about their successful adoptions-celebrate being a forever family-we will survive.  God was with me during the conference calls after the news in August and He was loving on our little guy-even though he had no idea what was going on, and how much people-both in the US and Ethiopia were fighting for him.

“Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see”

Hebrews 11:1

Then October came-and a little light cracked through the darkness in our pit-this might actually happen!  We waited and watched quite a dramatic turn of events evolve…and at Thanksgiving received word-he was in the Capitol City and would be submitted to Embassy within a week.  Praise God!  Praise God! Praise God!

Now not defy the odds, but if you have adopted from Ethiopia recently-you are aware that the timelines for Embassy can range up to 6 weeks, if not 8-12.  We set in for a late January/February travel date…hey maybe he would miss much of the snow I was so worried about for him—preschool-well he will get a lot of support and we still hope for Kindergarten 2012…we don’t care at this point-we just want to see him, hold him and love him.

Well 5 days into our Embassy Submission we got THE CALL-not only that within 48 hours I was on a plane to bring him home, before Christmas!  God is so good-his timeline was exactly how it should be.  I mean, we are three weeks into being a family of four and we are finally seeing snow-it has been so warm here that M and brother played outside during the Christmas break!  We have been to church and have dedicated M “Isaiah” and promised to raise him with a faith and believe in God.  I don’t think that will be too difficult as his journey thus far is a testament to the Spirit and the Ways in which He works.

At the Airport-December 23rd, 2011

Now I will admit, the transition into life of a family of four is not storybook-or easy.  It is tough, we are muddling through this one step at a time-but loving every step of it and we know that God will be with us through this next step of our journey.

May you be blessed,

Jessica Cabeen

Blog: Bring Home Our Family

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